Old Concern re awakened.

New kanye album changes everything. He is the primary celebrity and artist. he has the power and momentum. He has created a genuine work of art worth keeping. Something to be looked too and challenges us. Last album like this In Rainbows. But Let's face it. A painter can never have this popular momentum/ Can he?

The issue I now face is that accepting that I have chose my media of representation. How can I be as powerful. I know I shouldn't care about how big my audience is. But I really believe I have something important and relevant. So I should care.

But You see that Music can be distributed to everyone. Nearly. Rapidly. and if it isn't taken seriously as a way of communicating an idea. (But it is so serious) Then at least it brings people to each other and in communication. It is danced to. (I am so jealous of that)

And books are read with great care and concentration. People really focus when they read. They are made to use their imagination and focus. Or they don't get it.

But painting has neither advantage. It is difficult to feel it connect with people and connect people. and it is hardly taken as a seriously.

I want the impossible. I want both. I want the self contradiction of physical reaction from my painting and truly serious thought. I want to be bigger than Kanye. More important to chicago than Kanye. And I want to do it though a medium that is at best viewed as deeply spiritual.